I don’t get nostalgic often. Sure, I appreciate and will mildly indulge in a sweet passing memory, but I don’t spend much time focusing around those thoughts as I find it occasionally leads to, for me, anyway, a shift in thinking – away from forward movement, to wishing some things were how they used to be. Or worse even, sometimes regret will enter the picture. And we all know regret loves to keep depression as close company. Then the next thing you know I am in the fetal position on the bathroom floor feeling sorry for myself for reasons I have already forgotten because all I can possibly do now is just be extremely sad. I probably (read: definitely) am exaggerating here, but my point is, I find myself looking forward, and only forward so much that I actually having created this false fear of looking back on things. It is so bad that I will often forget that it is also important to take an occasional step back to realize your accomplishments, remind yourself of where you came from and use that for wind in your sails. Gas in your tank. Pep in your step. Scoot in your boot.
This week I did some file organizing and found some pieces I hadn’t thought about in a while. Today, my primary focus when it comes to creating art has been graphic design, however, there was a time that I would spend my days/evenings/what is now considered my sleeping hours, in the painting studio. Over the last several years, I have done a painting or two, here and there, for friends or gifts mostly, but I can’t recall the time that I just painted because I felt like it or had a grand idea I wanted to see realized. Not to say my “commissioned” projects haven’t been fun, quite the contrary, actually, as I have greatly appreciated the excuse to get out my painting supplies. Yet today – as I look through some of my these aged files I am reminded of those wine nights with my fellow art students, listening to David Bowie or Iron and Wine or the latest band we were certain no one else in the universe but us knew about, and discussing the stress of the deadlines or our Art Professor’s passion for Tarot cards – I realize I should really revisit this practice. Maybe sans the deadlines.
To share a bit of this nostalgia with all of you, here are a few of the paintings I have done, once upon a time. (Are they great? No. Am I still proud/happy with them? You bet. Are they available for purchase or a gallery showing? Absolutely! Anytime! If fact, my studio is on wheels these days and ran out of my car due to the size of my current apartment – I can come to you! Home delivery, the latest in art collection convenience!)
Also, don’t ask me about my hair yet. It is still in the process…. patience my dears.